I’ve learned how not to miss the age of tenderness
That I am so lucky to have seen once
And now that I’ve become older I’ve learned how to brush over
My history and how it’s sequenced
When I think about you I see a person who
Hasn’t existed for a long time
Before you started using, before I starting choosing
To do the same thing for the same reasons
The first name I called you is not a name at all
More of a duty than a function
Often an execution, often with deep confusion of
‘Who was I when that name was just mine?’
Like a serpent charmer negotiating harm
I live with a basket of your silence
And as the years record I can feel it growing board
But I keep the top on in the meantime
When I pass my reflection there isn’t any question of
Where the person in it came from
When I catch myself thinking and hear the voice that speaks inside
I know where I got my brain from
Every step I’ve strayed from and followed
Led me to the same location
Every act I’ve forsake and borrowed
A delivery to now
And I’ve never wondered how I came to be
I feel free like you promised I’d be
