I sit I'm my room claustrophobic,
As I watch the walls breath succumbing to self pity,
And these voices wont leave.
I got a revolver in my hand with six chambers and they all full,
Every bullet contradicts the contemplation of suicide.
I wanna die.
So I sit and clinch my bible until my palms sweat,
And blister, cause I hate my sister.
First I'm gonna light a candle in the form of a seance,
And see the light on the wall reflect all this childhood neglect.
I cock the hammer,
I let the steel touch my tongue and taste the metal for the first time,
I see the faces of my loved ones, but f*ck a note,
Cause when I do it,
I want it to be a mystery,
And let them feel the same pain that I felt, this is the remedy.
[Chorus]
Goodbye, sad days,
I'd rather sleep my life away goodbye, heartbreak,
I found my own way, suicide
I get on my knees and say a prayer,
I tell god that I cant handle all this pressure,
I wanna kick it up there.
Why should I wanna live?
When my mother used to molest me in front of my stepfather,
She beat me and he undressed me, see.
He took my manhood before I became a man,
So now I sit here at 16 with this gun in my hand.
Death is the only way out,
The murder of myself will show em all the there's a way out,
I cry for my soul.
Depression has taken a toll on my every existence,
So when I think of humiliation I can't breathe, its time to leave.
Cause I'm gone show what you did,
For tormenting me as a kid, you raised me,
Now look what I did
[Chorus]
I don't wanna die,
I wanna breathe again,
I don't wanna have to say
[Chorus]
My soul is slipping away,
I don't wanna leave,
Not in this way
